


We'll Watch the Buildings Turn To Dust

by purplevanity



Series: even gods die, we think [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Pacific Rim Fusion, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-10-16
Updated: 2013-10-19
Packaged: 2017-12-29 14:47:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1006657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/purplevanity/pseuds/purplevanity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You know what the word Jaeger means, boy?" Keith Shadis smiles at him, brilliant and cunning. "Hunter. Your father knew that, and I guess you do too. Why else would you be here?"</p><p>Tags will be updated as the story progresses.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. EREN

**Author's Note:**

> The “Jaegers” in this are less like the Jaegers in the film and more like the EVAs in Neon Genesis Evangelion equipped with something resembling 3DMG, because they’re more mobile and I thought the actual Jaegers were too hulking for something that emphasizes litheness and speed like SNK. They still utilize the two-pilot system, however.
> 
> Title from "I'll Hold my Breath" by the lovely Ellie Goulding.

Listen: On Eren’s fifth birthday they bring him to Sydney, Australia. His father buys him ice cream and his mother puts on her best dress and they pose in front of the Sydney Opera House, smiling and whole and golden. They hang the picture on the wall above the fireplace, and his father likes to smile at it and swears he’ll bring Eren back one day.

The first Kaiju come when Eren is nine. It’s just one, at first, a little 3-meter tall reptile – and then comes another, huge and hulking and sixty feet tall, saliva dripping from its fangs. Sydney doesn’t stand a chance, and his father resignedly turns off the television when he hears the nuke announcement. It took three days and a million deaths. Honolulu is next, then San Francisco. America weeps, and so does Eren, his hands balled into fists.

But on Eren’s tenth birthday they bring out the Jaegers – new, beautiful, _dangerous_ , unholy offspring of humanity and machinery capable of burning civilizations. Their pilots take down Kaiju after Kaiju with graceful kicks and lasers, and humanity starts winning.

Their pilots are celebrities, every one plastered on tabloid headlines, invited to galas, having pictures taken with the President. Eren beats up a boy who says he wants to be one because he wants to be rich, and his parents end up having to talk to the principal.

“Say you’re sorry,” his mother says.

“It’s not fair,” Eren says instead.

* * *

 

Eren is twelve; his father is away. Before he and Mikasa leave for a school trip his mother gives him a peanut butter sandwich and kisses him on the cheek. Eren tells her he hates peanut butter. Mikasa smacks him.

It’s the last thing he ever says to her before the alarm goes off. Carla screams – _why here, why now –_ She pushes her children out the door, kisses both of them on the forehead – _I’m just going to check on the basement, darlings, I’ll be right back -_

Debris, and then there is nothing.

Eren screams, his vision white-hot, Mikasa’s fingers tense on his arm. _Run_ , she mouths.

He gets the news of the Colossal Kaiju white-faced and trembling in the evacuation center, Mikasa clutching fearfully to his arm, Armin sobbing. Three Jaegers and countless soldiers go down. _Freedom Wing,_ piloted by Erwin Smith, finally kills the thing, but Zhiganshina is devastated. The guard – Hannes, he remembers – tells them they found his mother’s body, but his father’s is nowhere to be found. _Burnt to a crisp, probably_ , Hannes says sadly, ruffling Eren’s hair.

He has never felt this _furious_. Eren cries until he runs out of tears, his lungs heaving from the sobs, Mikasa never this afraid to touch him. In the end they are palmed off to a disinterested uncle who is only too happy to let them run off to the military.

* * *

“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” says Mikasa after Zhiganshina, waiting for Eren’s uncle to load the bags into the car.

“I’m sorry you had to go through that again,” is all Eren says in response. “Here.” He hands her the scarf.

Mikasa says nothing.

* * *

 

His life is easily halved – _before, after_. _Before_ was trips to Disneyland and photo booths with his father. _Before_ was Armin’s quiet voice while they did schoolwork in Eren’s high-ceilinged attic and the smell of cookies in the oven. Mikasa teaching him how to throw a good right hook. He’s always felt great, fighting with her; his father even encourages it despite his mother’s protests. “It’s a good outlet, Carla,” he says, watching the children cavort in the yard.

 _After_ is ashes and burnt rubble, of late nights in the Academy and his entire body sore from the training. _After_ is the last picture of his parents in his wallet and blood, sweat, and tears, Keith Shadis staring down at him and telling him he looks like his mother.

But then comes graduation – there are less than twenty of them now, where there had once been a hundred-strong promising youths – and Erwin Smith standing at a podium, one of the last Mark I pilots remaining now that Nile and Dot went down two months ago – telling them _Congratulations, you’ve made it, now for the testing_ –

They pair up easily. Eren can tell the brass is pleased to have such a talented crop. Jean and Marco synchronize perfectly as they do in real life; Reiner and Bertolt fit together like two peas in a pod. Annie and Ymir manage to scrounge up drift compatibility somehow; Eren supposes it’s in the insults they bat each other while in the drift.

Armin and Krista go for research. They’re not combatants, never have been, and Hange Zoe welcomes them easily, a big smile on her face.

Mikasa graduates top of the class, of course; Eren hadn’t expected anything less from her. Her instructors call her a genius – _perfectly drift-compatible with anyone,_ they say, astounded, Mikasa sitting dissatisfied outside their offices listening to them talk, her fists clenching and unclenching.

“I won’t drift with anyone except Eren,” she says firmly. That, at least, is something she can control.

It’s a start. 

 

* * *

 

"What's your name, son?"

  
Eren inhales. Exhales. In, out. "Jaeger, sir. Eren Jaeger."

"You know what the word  _Jaeger_ means, boy?" Keith Shadis smiles at him, brilliant and cunning. " _Hunter_. Your father knew that, and I guess you do too. Why else would you be here?"


	2. jean

 

“You know,” says Krista at lunch, her blond hair falling in her face, “I never would’ve pegged the two of you as drift compatible when training started.”

Marco gives Jean a half-smile and raises his fist for a bump, which Jean happily obliges. “Really?” Jean laughs, his hand reaching for Marco’s. “You didn’t sense our astounding sexual tension from day one?”

“Jean!” Marco turns twelve different shades of red, batting Jean’s hand away. He turns back to Krista. “Oh, Jean was awful when training started, Kris, we both know it. It took all that _character development_ –”

“Your good influence,” Jean says good-naturedly, ruffling Marco’s hair – because he’d be damned if Marco’s personality didn’t have any hand in knocking their four solo kills (and three as part of a team, excuse you) under their belts.

Krista giggles. “You guys are adorable.”

They eat in companionable silence for a while, Jean occasionally spooning corn and carrots into Marco’s mouth as Krista watches, amused. Annie and Ymir join them, plunking their trays down onto the cafeteria’s plastic tables.

“If it isn’t Loverboy and Boytoy, PDA extraordinaires,” Ymir says, leaning over and putting an arm around Krista. “Darling, we’re never going to be that disgusting, all right?”

Marco lets out a laugh, the wonderful, good-natured kind that removed all tension. “Sorry,” he tells them, pushing Jean away. “I actually thought you guys would pilot, though.”

“Oh – no!” Krista squeaks as Ymir pulls at her hair. “I didn’t think I could handle it. I’ve never been a combatant, really, and my scores were never that good, and I thought that I didn’t _really_ want to go out in a Jaeger.”

“You were never curious about combat drift?” Annie pipes up, managing to sound disinterested nevertheless.

“I–” Krista scratched the back of her head. “I don’t know. I’m fine where I am – Armin, Hange, you guys, San Francisco–but I guess I always wanted to know what it was like being in someone’s head.”

Jean opens his mouth to answer, but then the alarm rings and Mike’s voice comes over the speaker, demanding all crews to report to deck.

* * *

 

Category III, Mike says, typing frantically on his keyboard –twenty miles off coast. Sozo, they’ve nicknamed it already. Erwin sweeps the room critically – Eren’s broken arm, Annie’s sprained ankle, Bertolt and Reiner in the middle of some spat. His eyes land on Jean and Marco. “Whirlwind. Hydra. Prepare to be deployed.”

Jean and Marco high-five each other. “Ready to get that sixth solo kill?” Jean laughs, pulling Marco into a bone-crushing hug.

“You know I am,” Marco replies, grinning.

“Get a _room_ ,” Reiner moans, he and Bertolt walking after them.

It’s always been like that, Jean suggesting and Marco going along with it. Jean’s never excused it, because Jean had always been _active_ and Marco had always been _passive_ and in the end Marco had always been fine with Jean suggesting they prank-call Hange and Jean kissing him for the first time in the bunkers. It was simply the way things fell into place.

Perhaps he’d been right all along; Marco, after all, had never laughed at his top pilot dreams the way Eren had. It was Marco who’d encouraged his crush on Mikasa, and, when that fell through, it was Marco who’d helped him through the heartbreak.

And besides, Marco is the first person Jean had ever drifted with, and from the beginning it had felt like coming home.

Marco doesn’t talk about his home, even though he’s been to Jean’s more times than Jean can count. Jean doesn’t even know all the details, has never tried to look for the answers in the drift, just that Marco’s mentioned that his dad drinks and hates his older sister’s boyfriends and his mom is hardly there anymore. Jean’s never questioned, especially not when Marco says – _the Shatterdome is my home now_.

Once he would have questioned how anyone would find this shit metallic hellhole home, but by now Jean’s learned to smile agreeably. _We’re in this together, both of us. All of us_.

* * *

 

The four of them are thirteen miles into the Pacific Ocean, Erwin feeding instructions into the intercom, Mike and Hange occasionally chiming in cheerfully. Jean’s grown to like the old man in an awkward, too-young-dad kind of way, but Erwin’s eyes gleam with secrecy and Jean can tell he’s barely scratched the surface.

“You guys good?” Reiner calls into the comm.

Jean has Whirlwind give him a mock salute.

 _Ready_? Marco thinks. Jean hears it clear as day, and knows he doesn’t have to answer.

The Kaiju is huge – far bigger than anything he and Marco have ever faced. “Man, that thing is _ugly._ Look at that ass,” Reiner hoots, and although Jean, Marco, and Bertolt aren’t the type to talk while fighting, it’s comforting having Reiner there.

It lunges.

Hydra’s built like a linebacker and Reiner and Bertolt engage it easily, grappling and stumbling and trying not to collapse into the ocean. Whirlwind falls back then lunges forward, blades at the ready, aiming for the strike –

“Shit,” Bertolt yelps as Sozo swings its arm, socking Whirlwind straight in its center of gravity.

“What the _fuck_ ,” Jean shouts, wincing as the robot careens backwards.

“Load those plasma cannons,” Marco says. Jean leans forward and pushes some buttons, watching Hydra trap it in a headlock and bashing it repeatedly.

“We’ll get through this,” says Jean.

Whirlwind raises its arms, cannons at the ready. “Hydra, move out,” Jean yells into the comm. “We can’t get a clear shot.”

Hydra bashes it twice more for good measure, then retreating as Sozo stands there, dazed. Jean aims, fires. Two solid hits, the kaiju crashing into the ocean, Reiner whooping in victory.

“Five,” Marco laughs, triumphant and breathy, and that’s the last thing Jean ever hears him say.

Mike – _“HYDRA, WHIRLWIND, THAT THING’S NOT DEAD YET_ – _”_

Jean screams. It's all too fast.

 _I love you, I love you, I love you –_ says the Drift, echoing a thousand times over, but then there’s nothing after that; and for the longest time Jean hears Marco’s pulse beating in his ears and then stopping. Reiner and Bertolt kill it, somehow, Jean feeling adrenaline coursing through his veins as he lands shot after shot after shot, Marco's dying thoughts still beating into his brains. Afterwards he collapses onto the bay and tries not to cry.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notes: In this AU, Krista gets over her death seeker issues much earlier. Jean/Marco is a thing, Bert/Reiner are Heterosexual Life Partners, Annie/Ymir will be explored later.
> 
> Also, I just plugged in names from the jaegernamegenerator on Tumblr.
> 
> Annie/Ymir – Tornado Omega
> 
> Eren/Mikasa – Orion Moonlight
> 
> Reiner/Bertolt – Hydra Olympus


End file.
